Crossover Shabbat

This is a re-do of a picture I drew a few years ago. The original was done in markers, and horribly sloppy. 

Basically, this is an ode to Jewish characters and character-actors in fiction. 

STARTING AT THE LEFT, GOING CLOCKWISE:

Mel Brooks:
The brains behind "Blazing Saddles," "Young Frankenstine," "Spaceballs," and "Robin Hood: Men in Tights." Before going into movies, Brooks served in WWII, defusing bombs. During that time he met European Jews who'd been liberated from concentration camps. When Mel Brooks makes fun of Hitler and Nazis in all his movies, it's personal. 

Yentl (Barbra Streisand):  
The Jewish Mulan, basically. Streisand wanted to make a Jewish movie about the Old Country that *wasn't* about the Holocaust, so she came up with a story that dealt with bigotry *within* the Jewish community, rather than against it. It's an interesting movie (albeit, one with a lot of oddly-placed musical numbers and the most awkward wedding scene in Hollywood history). 

The Hebrew Hammer:
If you're Jewish--or know a lot about Judaism--and love politically incorrect humor, this movie is for you. The Hebrew Hammer is a vigilante to defends little Jewish kids from bullies, battles Santa's evil son Damien Clause (Andy Dick), and seduces a voluptuous Jewess. 

Jerry Seinfeld:  
My dad is a huge fan, and the sitcom "Seinfeld" was my introduction to adult TV shows. But if I live to be 100, I will never forgive him for "Bee Movie."  

Mordecai Heller:  
One of the most popular characters in Tracy Butler's webcomic "Lackadaisy," Mordecai is the obligatory Jewish gangster in this tale of bootlegging cats. He's a combination of the calculating businessman Meyer Lansky, and the psychotic hitman Bugsy Siegel. 

Lauren Bacall:  
Famous among film noir fans, Bacall was a classic femme fatale in the 1940s, and continued making movies until her death this year. She stared with and married Humphrey Bogart (AKA that guy from "Casablanca"), and in her later years, voiced the Witch of the Waste in "Howl's Moving Castle."

The story of her and Bogie's marriage is very sweet. After a freakishly dysfunctional marriages, Bogart finally found true love with Lauren, but feared the age difference would leave her a widow far too soon. But Bogie's friend Peter Lorre (more on him later) convinced him to propose, by saying "Five good years are better than none." 

Ron Jeremy  

I was VERY ignorant when I drew this. In my defense, I did see one or two interviews where he'd seemed intelligent and respectful, discussing how unfair society is to women versus men in the porn industry. And I always laughed at his cameos because "Dur hurr, porn guy! It's funny because, fat porn guy!" 

Had I known, I would have excluded him as I did Roman Polanski. (Between those two, Bill Cosby, the dad from "Seventh Heaven," Jim Buckles, JewWario, Kobe Bryant, and possibly even Gene goddamn Roddenberry, I'm starting to get very paranoid and cynical about performers in general.)

Woody Allen:  
Mel Brooks' challenger for the title of King of Jewish Comedy, Allen basically plays the same panicking dopey Jewish nerdy guy in every movie. "Sleeper," "Midnight in Paris," and "Annie Hall" are all great movies. (Do NOT be fooled by people who say that "Annie Hall" is a "romantic comedy." It's nothing like any "rom-com" you'd see in Hollywood today. For starters, they DON'T stay together at the end.) 

Art Spiegelman:
Author of "Maus," a graphic novel about the Holocaust, that casts mice as the Jews and cats as the Germans. (And dogs as Americans, and Pigs as Poles, and gypsy-moths as Gypsies, fish as Brits, etc.) It's actually based off of the experiences of Art's parents, who were Holocaust survivors. The story begins with Art interviewing his father for the comic he plans to writer, and its told in flashbacks, with inter-cuts of the present. It is MUCH better than I'm making it sound. I'm thinking of re-reading it just from tying this. Check it out.

Jeff Goldblum  
She-geeks have lusted for this dazzling nerd since he stared in the 1986 remake of "The Fly," and continued to do so in "Jurassic Park," "Earth Girls Are Easy," "Invasion of the Body Snatchers," and "Independence Day." Like Woody Allen, Goldblum's a character actor, who always plays a ranting, rambling nerd. His characters' religions/ethnicities are usually not stated in these movies, but if any film tried to present Goldblum as anything other than a Jew...I'd laugh. Hard.

Lambchop  
A sheep sock-puppet created by Sherri Lewis. Lambchop was a series aimed at very tiny children, that often had Jewish themes. (Instead of a Christmas special, they had a Hanukkah one). Lambchop taught me the Song that Never Ends.

Grace Adler:  
The "Grace" from "Will & Grace." I really just included her for nostalgic reasons; my roommate and I used to watch the show all the time in college. And I thought it would be great if her love for shrimp caused problems at Shabbat (shrimp aren't kosher!). 

Grandpa Boris:  
Tommy Pickles' grandpa on "The Rugratz," Boris lead every Jewish holiday special. He was the most memorable character on the show IMO, always arguing with Aunt Miriam about "the old country" and butting horns with his arch rival Schlomo. 

Peter Lorre  
...AKA that sad, strange little man who has been spoofed by ever cartoon ever. (The worm in "Corpse Bride," the f*cked up lamp in "Brave Little Toaster," the scientist on "Loony Tunes," etc.) Do not be fooled by the grotesque cartoon spoofs of him. He was adorable and often dead sexy in his human form. More important, he was one of the greatest actors who ever lived. And Hollywood got him because he had to flee Germany when Hitler came to power, because he was Jewish (though not a practicing Jew).

According to Peter's biography, this had a lasting effect on him. One fancy hotel assured him that they didn't serve Jews, not realizing Peter himself was one. Peter responded by "accidentally" spilling ink on the counter, wakled out, and later ordered the hotel a subscription to a Jewish magazine. Another time, at the New York Colony Club, Peter was told he would be seated before dozens of other people waiting behind a barrier, because as a celebrity he was "more important." He responded by pulling the barrier down and seating the tourists himself, telling the waiter, "I know how it feels to be kept out." 

Natalie Portman:  
Not only Jewish, but born in Jerusalem. She's a far better actress than "Star Wars" would have you believe. (It was the director's fault, not Natalie's.) She took a break from acting to go to college, saying "I'd rather be smart than famous." 

Kippi Ben Kippod  
In Israel, Sesame Street has no Big Bird. Instead they have a giant purple hedgehog named Kippie. We watched the Israeli Sesame Street a lot in Sunday School. I have fond memories of it. When I taught Sunday School as a teenager, us teachers were laughing harder than the students, because a lot of the jokes referred to 90s pop-culture and famous movies that flew over the kids' heads. 

Kyle Brofloski:  
The secondary protagonist of "South Park," the voice of reason, and the only one with the power to see Mr. Hankey. Beneath his green winter hat is an orange fro that's almost bigger than the rest of him. 

Isabella Garcia-Shapiro  
The female lead of "Phineas and Ferb," Isabella is the only Hispanic Jew I can think of on television (besides Epstein, from that show I hate so much I forgot what it's called). There is actually a huge Jewish community in Argentina, and an entire ethnic group of Jews with Spanish ancestry; they're called Sephardic Jews, while the ones you hear about more often in the U.S. are the Ashkenazi. 

I imagine that at this Shabbat, Isabella will teach Kyle some new words in Spanish, and Kyle will teach her some new words that will get her sent to the principal's office.

Mitzvah Mouse:  
The hero from a series of made-for-very-tiny-kids movies called "Aleph Bet Blast Off!" It's another Muppet/Sesame Street type of series, with a combination of humans and puppets. A "mitzvah" is a good deed, so the Mitzvah Mouse is basically here to teach little kids morals. There are also several human-puppets, who creeped me out as a kid, and REALLY creep me out now. And after re-watching a clip, the mouse is pretty f*cking creepy too. Just watch this clip and try not to wet yourself: www.google.com/search?q=aleph+…

Krusty the Clown  
How did the son of a rabbi end up becoming the vulture, drunken clown we all love from "The Simpsons"? The world may never know. But someone better get that wine away from Krusty before he downs it all. 

Gene Wilder:  
AKA the guy who played Willy Wonka. (The REAL Willy Wonka. Not that Tim Burton crap.) Maybe not too fitting here, since his roles don't usually make a big deal out of his being Jewish. But he worked with Mel Brooks so much, and he always comes up when anyone is discussing famous Jews, that it was impossible to snub him.

Meyer Lansky  
Not the real Lansky. The one from "Boardwalk Empire," who has all the fangirls, and who keeps getting slashed with Lucky Luciano. Yes, there was a real crook named Meyer Lansky, and he's often called the father of the Jewish mafia. Tthough that title really should go to...

Arnold Rothstein:  
One of the earliest bootleggers, Rothstein was already well established when the 1920s began. He got famous for fixing the 1919 World Series, and was a notorious criminal and gambling addict. He introduced class to the American gangster, teaching other criminals to run their organizations like businesses, and dress like pimps instead of thugs.

He's also one of the best characters on the show "Boardwalk Empire," played by an amazing actor named Michael Stulhbarg. Stulhbarg researched his character so well that the show's writers often asked him for advice on writing Rothstein. But ladies, be warned before you Google the real Arnold Rothstein; he wasn't quite as handsome as Stulhbarg. 

Adam Sandler  
I don't give a damn what the critics say, I LOVE "8 Crazy Nights," and my sisters and I try to watch it every Hanukkah. Boom bitty bitty bitty booom boooooom.....

Fivel  
From "An American Tail" and "Fivel Goes West" and...that third sequel no one cares about. 

"An American Tail" deals with the immigration wave from Europe in the late 1800s. Fivel's family are Russian Jewish mice, but once in America, they meet up with a cute Irish mouse, and the most adorable Italian rodent ever drawn. Unfortunately, the part of the Tzar's men and the slave-driving factory bosses are all played by cats.  

Seriously, what is with this Jewish fascination with mice? I understand, "small and oppressed." But really, can we make ourself some other critter for a change? Like...cats? Or rats? Or hedgehogs? Well, I guess mice is better than Ferengi. 

I do not own any of these characters or celebrities. If I left out your favorite Jew go cry. 

Oh, and famous Jews on the wall:  

Anne Frank, Moses Montefiore (who my synagogue is named after), Albert Einstein, and Moses.